Keyboard Immortal

Chapter 900: Horrible Title

“Sir Zu, congratulations!” Piao Duandiao and Jiao Sigun looked envious. Even though they had both risen up three ranks themselves, that was only an official position. They hadn’t gone up an order of nobility.

Zu An had risen from being a baron to a viscount, and he’d even had his territory increased substantially! He now had practically three hundred more households to collect tax from, transforming him from a second-rate noble to a true noble in the social circles.

For example, the great clans in the capital would never consider a commoner for marriage. No matter how high one’s official post was, they wouldn’t even consider a baron. However, a viscount was already enough, let alone one that had climbed up to this position properly.

Piao Duandiao asked, “Right, what is big bro Zu’s new noble title…”

“I think it’s called ‘Green’…” Jiao Sigun was about to reply when Zu An cut him off.

“Enough already, don’t say that name.” Zu An’s eyelids twitched. He had given the emperor the Hat of Forgiveness last time. Even though the emperor didn’t know what it signified, he had picked up that Zu An’s expression was a bit off.

Together with the fact that Zu An had given Sang Qian a green hat as a present, the emperor had felt as if that thing might have some deeper meaning. Now that Zu An was a viscount, he had decided to just give him the title Green Hat.[1]

Zu An had almost exploded when he heard that name. What the hell? Why does the world keep messing with me like this? This name is even worse than Phoenix Man!

“I feel like ‘Phoenix Man’ from before sounded a bit better,” Piao Duandiao said sympathetically.

Jiao Sigun immediately argued, “I feel like ‘Green Hat’ sounds a bit more majestic. Just like how those Embroidered Envoys are always dressed in red, leaving the people in terror wherever they go, a color can deliver subliminal messages. Big bro Zu will just wear a green hat when he sets out in the future to match this title. That way, everyone will think of big bro Zu as soon as they hear the words ‘green hat’.”

Zu An was speechless. If that really happens, my reputation will go to shit for all of eternity! He quickly changed the topic when he saw that the two of them weren’t finished yet. “Right, what kind of post is that of Armed Escort Division Commander?”

Apart from being promoted from baron to viscount, he had also been granted the post of Armed Escort Division Commander. The guard system in the palace was extremely complicated, so he wasn’t too sure what that role was.

Piao Duandiao explained, “The palace’s imperial guards are separated into many squads. These squads are called divisions, and the Armed Escort Division Commander is the senior officer of the Armed Escort Division. The Armed Escort Division Commander is mainly in charge of defending the various palace gates.”

Zu An was stunned. He hadn’t expected the emperor to give him such a vital position!

After thinking about it for a bit, he guessed at the emperor’s intentions. On the surface, he was an outer subject, so he had to leave the palace promptly every day, but his status as an Embroidered Envoy made it so that he had to remain in the palace. He had to leave the palace first and change into the Embroidered Envoy identity before coming back in.

If anyone deliberately investigated that, they might discover some holes. Then, they would deduce his connection to Golden Token Eleven. But now that he had the Armed Escort Division Commander rank, it would be much more convenient for him to enter and exit the palace. He didn’t have to put on that act daily anymore.

But doesn’t this post also let me pass through the palace gates more easily? That dog emperor gave me the title ‘Green Hat’ to embarrass me, so I’ll make sure to pay him back properly for this! Zu An had a strange expression as his face heated up. Hmph, I’m an upstanding and upright person; would I do something like that?

“Big bro Zu, why are you drooling?” Jiao Sigun asked curiously.

“Was I? Haha, I think you’re seeing things.” Zu An quickly wiped the corner of his lips and chuckled in embarrassment.

“Anyways, big bro Zu, I still can’t accept this result!” Piao Duandiao couldn't help but blurt out after some hesitation. “It’s one thing that those King Qi Manor people weren’t exposed, but why was even that Meng Pan given a posthumous title? He was just a shameless bastard who ran in the middle of battle, and yet he’s being recognized as a hero and praised for countless generations?”

Zu An patted Piao Duandiao’s shoulder to console him when he saw how upset he was. “It can’t be helped; he’s the Meng clan’s heir. The crown prince still needs the Meng clan’s support, so the court can only do this for the greater situation.”

“But it’s not fair! So many of our brave companions died while sacrificing themselves, and yet they’re being treated the same as that despicable bastard!” Piao Duandiao drew his blade and hacked at a wooden plank off to the side. He used so much strength that his blade snapped. It was easy to see just how angry he was.

Jiao Sigun said indifferently, “That’s how the world works. Those who understand understand, and those who don’t won’t even if you explain it to them.”

“I understand your fucking mom!” Piao Duandiao had already been furious. Now that he was being taunted like this, he couldn't take it anymore. The two of them began to wrestle with each other.

Zu An couldn't help but chuckle. He knew that these two were close, and that little fights like this were normal. As such, he chuckled and left the palace. There were still many more people to meet outside.

…

Zu An was stunned when he left through the palace gates, because there wasn’t a large group waiting to welcome him the way he had imagined, let alone any pretty girls jumping into his arms while crying. He quickly realized that they had just decided to let him out. Those outside obviously hadn’t known when he would be able to leave.

He shook his head. He didn’t really mind, and so decided to go home first. It had been so long since he went home that he wondered if the maids and servants had run away. Soon after he returned, he saw that there was a servant sweeping the ground.

When he saw Zu An, the servant couldn't help but shout, “The master has returned!”

The entire courtyard became lively soon afterward. The maids, cooks, and boy servants all rushed out and surrounded Zu An excitedly. Even though there weren’t many of them, it filled the courtyard with a feeling of liveliness.

Zu An felt warm inside. All of this had been brought to him because of Chuyan. All of them had been carefully selected from the Chu clan. She hadn’t sent anyone like Cheng Shouping.

He greeted the servants while heading inside. Suddenly, he stopped and raised his head toward the entrance. He saw a placard above the main gate. The placard was a lush green color, and written in large golden characters were the words—Green Hat Manor.

Zu An felt the world spin around him. He almost fainted on the spot.

The little servant boy spoke as if he were presenting a great treasure, “When we learned that master was given the title of viscount, all of us felt that the baron placard wasn’t suitable. That’s why we worked through the night to make a new one. What do you think; doesn’t it look great?”

Zu An’s eyes twitched. “Are you Cheng Shouping’s brother?”

“I’m not…?” The little servant boy was confused.

Zu An took a deep breath. “Let’s swap out the placard and replace it with just the title of Viscount. Also, I don’t want to see any green colors.”

The servant boy replied, “But that doesn’t make sense! A title makes you more honorable than those inferior nobles; of course we have to write it on the placard!”

The others all voiced their agreement. They felt that this was better, and that the title couldn't be removed. Otherwise, their manor would look much worse.

Zu An was getting a headache from all of their chattering. He finally couldn't take it and roared, “Are you all the master or am I the master? Change it, or else I’ll send all of you back to take care of pigs!” He stormed off in a huff and slammed the door behind him. He didn’t want to see it anymore.

F*ck, you really reap what you sow… Zu An was still furious for quite some time. Out of helplessness, he could only use something else to distract himself.

He had collected a total of 432,022 Rage points, so he could pull the lottery a total of 4,320 times. He hoped that even though the world was disappointing, his gacha results wouldn’t be.

After praying for a long time, he pressed the pull button. He had already used this lottery system many times, so he didn’t feel like worshiping Buddha and begging the deities like before. He’d just let nature take its course.

Even though he made that choice, his eyes twitched when he saw the pull results. Out of 4,320 pulls, he had only gotten 349 Ki Fruits. Compared to the usual one to ten ratio, that result was absolutely terrible. That made him think it might be better to just buy things properly from the Shop in the future.

He continued to scroll through his pulls and saw that he had gotten a single tiger talisman. He had a few more saved up from before, so he would test his luck later to see if he could pull a valkyrie.

But his attention was quickly drawn to the last pull. The keyboard’s light indicator stopped over the G key. Then, a row of text appeared on the holographic screen.

Congratulations, you have successfully won Pin Ru’s Wardrobe!

1. Green hat = cuckold. ☜

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