Shepherding Humanity

Xu Zhi clicked on the post and found that every detail of Grantham’s dark past had been uncovered.

This was bound to happen. The moment players learned about the Era of Evil Witches, they’d know how bad the Slimes had it back then.

“Ha ha ha! 10 Rose Coins! So incredibly cheap! (?)”

“Lilith, the Great Queen of Babylon, once said: The appearance of the Slime species has saved the men of Babylon. It’s as if they’ve been custom-made to satisfy the needs of those evil witches! (?)”

“Stop, stop! I’m getting stomach cramps from all the laughing! I’m still eating, do you have some kind of a grudge against me? Your post is murdering me! (?)”

…

Everyone had something to say. The thread was filled with laughter and lively discussion.

To think that the just and glorious Emperor of Alchemy had this kind of a dark past! After all, he was a legend in the Magic World and revered as one of the mightiest emperors in history. Everyone found it unbelievable.

But they also felt relieved.

After a brief discussion, everyone put their VR glasses back on and reentered the game.

Since a few minutes outside was equivalent to days inside the game, a brief moment of distraction could get them killed.

And indeed, a player had died in the past few days.

“My King has died. Under my leadership, my ‘Esophagus’ species was thriving in the forest when a passing behemoth stepped on me and squished me underfoot. I know there are folks in the forum who were in a much worse situation than me, but did you die earlier than I did?”

This first player death caused waves in the forum.

It was a given that many people would die in this hardcore game and get kicked out one after another—there was even a bold prediction that said most people wouldn’t even last 3 years. But this was simply too soon.

Hands Off: “LOL, I’m still alive and have formed a symbiotic relationship with the bird in my nest. I’m no longer a hair that’s part of the nest and have turned myself into an ‘ahoge’ on top of the bird’s head. I can use my mental power to somewhat affect other birds, deter enemies, and help it hunt for prey.”

He added that under his leadership, his species was also thriving and steadily multiplying, turning into “ahoges” atop of the bird’s head.

*Screenshots.*

*Screenshots.*

The screenshots showed a very curious looking bird.

It had messy, pitch-black human-like hair growing on top of its head, giving it a very strange appearance. What’s more, the distribution of this hair was also weird. The top of the bird’s head was completely bald while surrounded by abundant black hair, forming a perfect tonsure.

Hands Off: “So, what do you guys think? I’m a great hairstylist aren’t I? (?)”

“That tonsure is absurd! Are you trying to make me laugh to death, then inherit my fortune? (?)”

“?. You really managed to form a symbiotic relationship?”

“Magic World, tremble in fear of the Evil God! Even if you kill me, tear me into pieces, and scatter my parts throughout the world, I can still corrupt other living beings, like this forest creature—the Tonsure Bird! (?)” ℟А𐌽ộꞖÈS̈

Others also spoke up.

*Screenshots.*

*Screenshots.*

Cute Girl who wants to Evolve into a Dragon: “See these screenshots? I’m the bone in the mouth of that giant dog… We have also reached a mutually beneficial arrangement and formed a symbiotic relationship. Now it’s in charge of bringing me food, and I’m in charge of creating offspring, giving it new bones to gnaw on.”

Everyone laughed out loud.

“What mutually beneficial arrangement? You’re being bred as livestock!”

“So this is the real-life version of ‘Beauty and the Beast’! (?)”

“Release that fair maiden! It’s my turn to lick her all over! (?)”

Cute Girl who wants to Evolve into a Dragon: “What is this? Stop laughing, you jerks!!!”

When the player who died saw these posts, he couldn't help but cry. People who were much worse-off than him were still alive, why did he have to be the only one who died? Why was he so unlucky? Who gets randomly killed off by a passing animal?

As a matter of fact, it was extremely difficult for them to survive alone; smarter players have all formed a symbiotic relationship. After all, they were only scattered organs, and were not built to survive by themselves. They could only rely on other creatures.

“Right, the player who died, tell us your location. We’ll head over and take custody of your species. We don’t want to be missing an organ later on because they’ve all died off.”

Learning is a Waste of Time: “One more thing, we should form 13 teams built around the 13 players who are in charge of our muscles. We’ll rebuild ourselves, then regather from all corners of the world.”

This was the best way to go about it since muscles were the bridge that connected the separate organs. Without them, they’d never be anything more than scattered body parts.

…

Meanwhile.

Cerebral Bluff, who was currently a vellum notebook, was resting on a bookshelf. He studied the beautiful blonde haired girl in the room while muttering to himself: “Right now, we’re a bunch of scattered organs and it’s extremely difficult for us to survive by ourselves! We can only attach ourselves to other creatures… But unlike those guys who formed a symbiotic relationship with birds and animals, it’ll be difficult for me to bond with a human being since I do not understand the native language.”

He had a rough grasp of his situation.

This girl, Linda, was part of a very wealthy family that owned a manor and various businesses. She was a proper young lady who loved reading books. While she did not have any magical talent and was only an ordinary human being, her elder sister was a Third-Level Witch studying in the Magic Academy.

“I must have been blown away to this location along with my subordinate “Skins” since we were close to one another. We were then found by this blonde beauty, Linda, who took the pieces of animal skin scattered on the ground and processed them into a vellum notebook.”

*Flutter.*

Without any warning, Linda suddenly went to the bookcase and took down Cerebral Bluff’s notebook. She returned to her desk and started reading.

The blonde beauty frowned as she flipped through the pages. “Am I imagining things? Why do I feel as if this notebook has gained several extra pages again? It’s almost as if it’s alive.”

Ever since this notebook came into her possession, unexplainable things kept happening in Linda’s home one after another:

Food constantly went missing in the kitchen.

When people went to the restroom in the middle of the night, they’d occasionally see a shadow scurrying away.

Their house was gradually turning into a scary and alien place.

Furthermore, weren’t the vellum pages of this notebook too thick? They even felt warm to the touch, and the more one stared, the more those creases on them looked like hideous mouths.

As the food in their house vanished over time, this notebook was also gaining extra pages.

What was going on?

An unnameable horror gripped Linda, like tentacles reaching out from the darkness. She shivered.

“It’s time I reveal myself.”

“I don’t understand the native language, and consulting the dictionary takes too long, but luckily, I have the netizens helping me out. Let’s see now… they’ve taught me the 13 most commonly used phrases in this otherworld, and the greeting went something like this: Hello, I come in peace…”

When those words passed Cerebral Bluff’s lips however, this was what actually came out:

“Hey Babe, wanna go on a date?"

Linda, who was flipping through the pages, instantly froze.

Her mind went blank with fear. She scrambled backwards while screaming: “Ah!!! This notebook can speak!”

Panic gripped her, and she exclaimed: “Such filthy language! Could it be that the Evil God who was slain by Hermes is still alive?”

A few days ago, the Evil God who descended upon the land was slain by the God of Wisdom close to the Babylonian capital. This was known to many, but for an ordinary girl like Linda, this might as well have happened in another world. Such world-shaking events had very little place in her ordinary daily life.

This notebook can speak!

Linda could swear to the God of Wisdom, Mercury, that this was the most creepy and horrifying thing she’s ever encountered in her life!

Calm down, I must calm down.

Linda took a deep breath and hurriedly consoled herself. This creepy evil book hadn’t killed her yet, so it might not be hostile. She’d hear it out first before deciding on her next course of action.

When Cerebral Bluff saw Linda screaming in fear, he too was beginning to panic.

At this moment, both of them were filled with anxiety.

He gulped. “Looks like I’ve scared her. I need to calm her down somehow. I still remember the words of reassurance that the netizens taught me. My next sentence should mean something like this: Please don’t worry, I am your friend.”

He opened his mouth to speak, but what actually came out was:

“Oh baby, please tenderly caress my body! Please write on me with your pen!”

Ah!!!

Linda loudly screamed.

She was utterly horrified. To think that a notebook would have a mind of its own! What’s more, it kept uttering such perverse words! As expected of the hideous and disgusting Evil God!

This malicious notebook was full of ill will!

“It looks like I was too hasty after all. Nobody would be able to accept the words of a talking notebook.”

Cerebral Bluff was really panicking now.

He wanted to reassure the terrified Linda, and hurriedly tried to remember the words the netizens taught him.

“Would you do me the honor of ripping me out of this notebook and using me to wipe your delectable ass?”

Ah!!!

With this, Linda completely lost it and started crying. “Pervert! You pervert!!!”

Why is she screaming so pathetically?

Cerebral Bluff’s mind was a mess. I’m very friendly! I’m a good person!

He hurriedly made his king seize control of all the notebook’s pages. The black notebook began to seductively bounce forward, while rapid-firing a stream of “friendly” words.

“Baby, can I drink your bathwater?”

He advanced one step at a time.

“Will you do me the honor of turning me into a leather vest and drape me over your beautiful body?”

He continued advancing.

“Please attentively lick every single one of my pages, and kiss me on the lips.”

…

Linda was practically mad with fear at this point. She retreated step by step until she was backed against the wall.

This…

This horrifying creature!!!

It was so dark, evil, and perverse.

“What a demonic tome!”

I’m doomed!

The beautiful Linda lost her mind and fainted.

“She passed out? It seems that a notebook speaking up all of a sudden was too much to accept even for a smart and beautiful girl like her.” This was what Cerebral Bluff naively thought. “But, those 13 common phrases full of kindness and good will should have been enough for my good intentions to reach her… right?”

I’m really not a bad person.

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