The Trashy PD Has To Survive as an Idol

“Let’s start with the shoot!”

“Yes!!”

Since I was notified about the delay in the reward settlement, no matter how much I called up the system window, it displayed the same thing.

[Processing—….]

If a server crashes, it should be dealt with within 24 hours.

It was a bit annoying, but dealing with the system window regarding rewards or penalties wasn’t my immediate concern.

Right now, I had a small, desperate wish that I longed for more than anything else.

“Wow, are we finally changing roommates?”

It was to have a single room.

However, living with Kang Ichae made me realize otherwise.

It was quite nerve-wracking.

I never thought I’d feel this way.

From coughing up blood, to catching a severe cold, to spreading family issues, I got hit with everything.

Each time our eyes met, Kang Ichae looked at me with a mocking expression, as if wondering what I would do next.

I had nothing to say.

Although I consistently maintained the attitude of “What? Why? What are you going to do about it?” I was reaching my limit.

I had to seize this opportunity; otherwise, who knows how long I’d have to endure this

Okay.

When I distracted Lee Jihyeon earlier, I took that opportunity to glance at the makeshift table set up for the shoot, where papers related to roommate assignments were scattered. ȓáΝ𝙤𐌱Êꞩ

After skimming through the underlined parts, it seemed they decided to do it through a ladder game.

Three people could get single rooms.

The connecting lines were left blank for the members to draw, but the names at the top and the results below were fixed.

I quickly memorized the order of results.

The single rooms and shared rooms were alternately listed.

A three out of five chance.

Not bad.

“Alright, let’s start the ladder game to decide roommates. The rules are simple. We’ve covered the results, so each of you can take turns drawing lines on top of it.”

“Yes!”

Jeong Dajun ran up excitedly, followed leisurely by the other members.

“Wow, you’re showing your personality.”

“Dajun, is that a spider web?”

“How is it?! My modern art?!”

I arrived last.

I calculated the path by following the lines in reverse from where the single room slots were each time a line was drawn.

Then, I met Kang Ichae’s eyes as he lazily drew a line with a yawn and turned away.

“Hyung, what will you do if you can’t room with me anymore?”

“Yeah, that would be sad.”

“Haha?”

Spouting empty words, I strode up to the ladder game and surveyed the entire thing.

Jeong Dajun’s lines were a tangled mess, but it seemed I could achieve my goal by adjusting just two spots.

Scratch-scratch.

I discreetly drew one line at the top and another in the middle, avoiding the last spot.

“Huh~?! Hyung, is that enough? Then what about me?”

“One or two lines are enough.”

As I shrugged and returned to my spot, Kang Ichae’s intense gaze followed.

He frowned, seemingly displeased, then soon smirked.

Aha?

That was the look on his face.

I quickly turned away and asked another member,

“Shall we reveal the results now?”

But Kang Ichae wouldn’t let it go quietly.

He raised his hand with a mischievous laugh.

“Ah! Can Ichae draw just one more line?”

“No, you can’t.”

“Just one little heart~.”

“It’s already over.”

“Haha~.”

“Hey, hey! Kang Ichae!”

No!

I couldn’t curse due to the cameras rolling, so I grimaced, but Kang Ichae dashed over and connected another line in a heart shape to the one I had drawn.

Shit! No! That’s the shared room!

Just as I was about to declare it invalid, Jeong Dajun tore off the results sheet excitedly.

After failing to stop him, the camera staff zoomed in on my outstretched arm as if mocking me.

Jeong Dajun, humming the BGM of that horror movie with the shark, connected each member’s name to the results with a red pen.[1]

“Ah, I have a single room.”

“Oh, me too.”

Being an only child, Jeong Dajun seemed indifferent, lacking any longing for a single room, and Kim Seonghyeon was equally nonchalant.

“Ah~, hyung, you shouldn’t feel lonely already.”

“Get lost.”

As I suppressed my rising anger alone, Kang Ichae continued to tease me.

“Ah, Hoyun! We’re in the same room.”

“…Yeah.”

The only consolation was that Kang Ichae had a single room, and my new roommate was Seong Jiwon.

Suppressing a sigh that seemed ready to escape, the camera’s red light turned off, and the planning team announced that they would end the scene there.

I immediately grabbed Kang Ichae by the neck and asked,

“How did you know that was a single room, you bastard? You didn’t see the results sheet.”

“Ah, hyung. I didn’t know. Who could figure that out from that mess?”

“Then?”

Kang Ichae chuckled, his eyes squinting playfully.

“I just didn’t like what you were doing, so I added one more line.”

“…”

Indeed, Kang Ichae was a punk.

A punk with sharp instincts.

.

.

.

[Oh my gosh, the teaser for the reality show on YouTube is out already!]

While The Dawn adjusted to their new dorm and Seo Hoyun resigned himself to his fate, the solo concert date and the reality show broadcast date for the winners of Shining Star Season 2 approached.

[This is too much stimulation right now… Just imagining the choreography of the track and the Black Call cover]

[Can we get something cute? ㅠㅠㅠ I really want to see Kang Ichae with a headband]

[People crying while reading letters during the concert <- Kim Seonghyeon

└Seo Hoyun crying

└Let’s just hope for the next life]

While the reality show was highly anticipated, fans were frantically refreshing the page for the first solo concert tickets.

[Oh fuckㅋㅋㅋㅋ How could they announce it two months in advance and then have the ticketing a month later, it’s too rushed]

[What are you talking about, my ex-husband’s group announced it a month before]

The constant criticism of Daepaseong Entertainment’s management continued, but the veteran fans who had been with The Dawn since their debut, before Seo Hoyun joined, just smiled knowingly.

[You guys don’t know Daepaseong yetㅎㅎ; if tvK wasn’t involved, these guys would announce it 2 weeks in advance and ticket it 3 days before…]

[Please don’t say such creepy things]

[No way in hell]

The fans tried to calm their pounding hearts, keeping an eye on both the solo concert booking site and a webpage for checking the time.

And as soon as the ticketing opened, the Noeuls calmly clicked their mice.

But.

[Wait a minute]

Most couldn’t even proceed to payment, their screens freezing or showing “503 Service Unavailable” as the site crashed.

It felt like it ended in threee seconds.

[Oh my god, I can’t believe it’s over???????]

[Unbelievable]

Desperately grabbing their phones was useless.

While some Noeul, devastated by missing out on the first concert, clutched their necks and collapsed, those who had beaten the fierce competition couldn’t contain their triumphant smiles.

As winners and losers emerged within the fandom in real-time, the reality show topic surfaced on social media.

[What will the kids do… I don’t really watch idol variety shows, so I don’t know;;]

[They’ll probably just visit hot places… even just doing pretty things is fine, their faces are entertaining enough]

While fans might watch The Dawn’s self-produced content on YouTube, the heavily themed concepts from the first episode wouldn’t work on a tvK broadcast.

So, Daepaseong Entertainment’s planning team decided to introduce The Dawn members in a way that even new fans could easily get to know them.

Ba-ram ba~ ba.

Ba-ra bam~ bam~.

A real documentary special.

[Yah]

It was like Human Theater.

[Yahㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

It was like Human Theater.[2]

After the intro music played, the scene shifted to their dorm, and Seong Jiwon’s calm voice came in as the narration.

– “The day of The Dawn has begun.”

Then, as the members passed by one by one, brief profiles appeared in Gungseo font subtitles at the bottom.

Moonman Leader, X-Idol, Practice Machine, Original Fierce Rapper, Puppy.[3]

Seong Jiwon’s question followed.

– “Q. How do you get along with the other members?”

– “A. I love my hyungs so much!”

– “A. Ahaha, I’m satisfied too~.”

The maknaes answered while giggling, and as the scene transitioned, Jeong Dajun was seen sliding across the new dorm floor, tackling Kim Seonghyeon, while Kang Ichae teased Seo Hoyun.

Crash, bang, boom!

– “Aaah!”

[ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋBut the cutsceneㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

[ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋThese kids are always making noiseㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

– “Ah~, I’m so lonely being in a single room these days.”

– “Don’t come. Do not come at all.”

[Seo Hoyun must have been aiming for a single room… Kang Ichae’s teasing is making him clench his teeth…ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

Since it was the first episode, it started with them moving into the dorm and simple games, but as they delved deeper, the content became quite packed.

[Wow, Kang Ichae, when asked by Jeong Dajun how much he made from composing, he just said enough to live on comfortably

└He must have made a lot… just look at “Humble Confession”…]

– “Can you raise elephants and still make a living?!”

– “(laughs) Of course, about ten of them.”

At Kang Ichae’s young and rich vibe, the fans were in awe, but suddenly he pushed back his hair and poked Jeong Dajun’s cheek.

– “But it looks like Jeong Dajun eats about that much.”

– “…!! N-no, that’s not true?!”

[ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋAhㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋJeong Dajun is fuming]

[He’s denying it but… Dajun, you have been eating a lot these days….]

[Hasn’t he grown taller?]

Overall, the episode was funny and entertaining, but the highlight was Seong Jiwon’s calm yet crazy questions.

– “Q. Is Jeong Dajun an elephant?”

– “A. …!!”

– “A. Ahahahahahakㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ (falls over)”

[Hey they’re crying from laughing so hardㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

The members, caught off guard by the random question, couldn’t hold back their laughter and doubled over.

Jeong Dajun was busy being angry alone, while Kang Ichae missed his chance to answer because he was busy giggling.

Taking advantage of that, the subtitles quickly labeled Jeong Dajun as an elephant.

After that, The Dawn members, who had calmed down a bit, started a recreational game.

Seo Hoyun remained expressionless, clapping perfectly in time with the beat as he dominated the game.

Clap, clap.

– “Seo Hoyun.”

– “Bunny Bunny, Bunny Bunny”

– “Carrot, Carrot”

Even when his name was called out and the members teamed up to attack him, Seo Hoyun handled it with ease.

[Wow, I thought he wouldn’t know these kinds of games]

[So cute, calling him Bunny Bunny…]

[Seo Hoyun… really going for that rabbit appeal

└ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

Fans were laughing along, but as the game escalated, they grew more and more surprised.

[What’s up with this guy?]

It’s because Seo Hoyun knew every single game.

Fans had no idea that Seo Hoyun, who used to be a variety show PD, had stayed up all night learning these games with his colleagues.

They just assumed he was being stubborn because he hated losing.

And his shamelessness was second to none.

– “Rolling the dice for ‘Shining Star Ribbon Boy.’”

– “Seo Hoyun, aren’t you embarrassed at all??

– “Seonghyeon, aren’t you sad you didn’t get called ‘Shining Star Abs Guy’?”

Seo Hoyun made a gesture as if he were brushing his hair back while sliding his hand across his neck, then went on to dominate the global capitals in a game of Blue Marble.[4]

As the tension rose, members started to argue over their territories.

– “Jiwon-hyung! You said you’d give me that land!”

– “Dajun, when did I?”

– “…!!”

[Ah shitㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋThey’re arguing so much during Blue Marble that they have to say “Aing, [Name] is scary” before speaking

Seong: I have a question

Ji: Yes, go aheadㅎㅎ

Seong: Isn’t this rule too favorable for Seo Hoyun and Kang Ichae?

└ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋFact bomb]

[Next to them, Ho and Yi[5]

“Aing, Hoyuni is scary, that’s my land, give me money right now”

“What are you saying to Ichaeㅠ”

└It’s really a fierce battle…….]

Even with only five minutes left in the 30-minute reality show, there wasn’t a single moment lacking in craziness.

Fans felt a sense of pride and shared their thoughts on SNS.

[It’s much cuter and funnier than I thought…… so healing,,,,]

[It has this subtle craziness ahㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ]

It was a good start.

If this level of quality was maintained, not only would the new Noeul members settle in smoothly, but it could also attract more new fans.

【Preview of Episode 2】

The preview for the next episode began.

The camera panned slowly upward from the bottom of a man stepping out of a shiny black sedan.

He was dressed in a perfectly fitted dark gray suit with a hint of blue, a white shirt, cufflinks peeking out from the sleeves, and a Patek Philippe watch swiped from one of the top idols, Mr. JWS, paired with a navy and burgundy striped tie.[6]

Under his neatly slicked-back pomade hairstyle was a clean forehead, and glasses perched on a sharp nose.

Closing the driver’s seat door, Seo Hoyun crinkled his nose and adjusted his glasses familiarly, then held his phone to his shoulder.

– “I think we have discussed this before.”[7]

Lee Jihyeon, the hellish concept enthusiast, insisted that Seo Hoyun had to speak in English for this scene, and he reluctantly acted it out.

As he glanced at his watch and headed to the company, Jeong Dajun’s voice overlaid the scene.

– “The ghost of Team Leader Seo has appeared!”

Seo Hoyun, having nothing really to say, just uttered random English words as he walked along.

– “We have Elephant Dajun in our company.”[8]

However, the Noeul members at the time couldn’t hear a word Seo Hoyun was saying.

They were just in a daze.

[Oh shit]

The stimulation was too intense.

[Team Leader Seo, shit!!!!!!!!!!!]

As Seo Hoyun walked slowly down the hallway, the company logo flashed on the screen.

The company logo appeared alongside the side profile of Seo Hoyun walking down the hallway.

The perfect environment for Seo Hoyun to legally torment people.

【Episode 2 – The Dawn Electronics】

The office version was back.

[1]Jaws.

[2] It’s a long running show in Korea. You have probably heard of its BGM before, it’s very popular. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szeZX1hgG0o

[3] Hoyun’s nickname is 똘X이, or, uncensored, “똘아이”. It refers to someone who is a bit of a nutcase, eccentric, or crazy.

[4]Blue Marble is a Korean version of Monopoly.

[5] Seong = Seonghyeon, Ji = Jiwon, Ho = Hoyun, Yi = Ichae

[6] Those watches are $$$.

[7] Anything bolded are originally in English.

[8] The original had it “Dajun Elephant” but that was too awkward.

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