Chapter 221
I'm craving jjajangmyeon.
The thought struck me out of nowhere. Perhaps it's because everyone around me is decked out in pitch-black tuxedos. Or maybe I've had too much bread these past few days?
Leaning against the bar, I picked up a glass of champagne.
A famous actor who won last year's Academy Award walked past. I should be used to this by now, but encountering a celebrity I've only seen on screen is still visually shocking.
I quenched my thirst with champagne and scanned the bustling crowd to locate Nam Joyoon and Lee Songha.
Nam Joyoon was still in the same spot.
His expression was bland, but that's nothing new. He was with Director Oh Hyunkyung, manager Kim Hyunsup, and an interpreter. The atmosphere seemed fine.
And Lee Songha.
"She's a fine actress, isnt she?"
Someone approached and commented.
"That girl you're managing. Shes young, elegant, and her gaze has a peculiar charm. Just standing there, she looks like she has a story, exactly the type actors like these days."
The woman's age was hard to gauge from her appearance.
Her nose slightly crooked, her sophisticated hairstyle even included grey streaks, and her cynical eyes were striking, seeming to enjoy overpowering others at first glance.
It was clearly the first time we met. Who is she?
"Ah, Ren Emmerich."
She handed me a business card.
A partner-level agent at UG Agency.
Not one of Hollywood's top agencies, but still a solid and influential company with many good clients.
"Im Jung Sunwoo."
Ren Emmerich glanced at the business card I handed her and slipped it into her clutch. Then, with a gesture of her chin, she pointed behind her.
"Im not usually one to meddle in other peoples affairs, but see that man talking to your actress?"
I quickly turned my head.
Just a moment ago, Lee Songha was talking to a pleasant-looking elderly French director, but now she was speaking with a Hispanic man in his fifties.
"Hes known for offering roles in exchange for sleeping with unknown actresses and models."
What?
"He definitely secures jobs, and he doesnt scam them. But if you're not interested, it's best not to give out your contact. Hes persistent once he gets attached."
"I better go. Oh, thanks."
"Thanks? It's nothing. Just trying to be nice."
Ren Emmerich.
I pocketed the business card and hurried off. In the meantime, Lee Songha's expression had turned sour, while the Hispanic mans face was filled with a sleazy smile.
That agent, you know?
A Korean agent? Just cut him off.
The man gestured as if throwing away trash.
"You should swim in bigger waters to catch bigger opportunities. You have the talent, its a pity. You prefer shows or films? Work with me, and you could start auditioning tomorrow."
"No thanks. Even if I go to the bigger waters, Ill go with my agent."
Do you have what it takes?
I hesitated for a moment. I briefly considered pouring my champagne over that greasy face.
I do, so mind your own business.
Lee Songha waved her hand dismissively, annoyed.
I moved on.
Songha.
Oppa.
Lee Songha's frowned brows relaxed. Meanwhile, the Hispanic man scanned me from head to toe and then disdainfully turned his head away.
This is fresh.
Most of the people I've met here have been similarly uncomfortable.
Bright smiles like those in toothpaste ads. A humorous and polite demeanor, hugs are standard, and theres a sense of making guests from afar feel welcome... a strange distance?
But this overt contempt was a first for me.
Think carefully
I interrupted the oily voice.
If you dont want to ruin your suit, stop talking and leave. Im debating whether to pour this champagne on you right now.
Ah? This tuxedo is expensive. Lets not do something youll regret.
Lee Songha understood why people threw things whenever she exploded.
What else are hands for?
To throw.
My grip on the champagne glass tightened.
Seeing this, the man raised his hands cheekily.
Then, after you cut this agent off, call me. If you dont want to regret it later, dont throw away my business card.
And with that, he turned and left.
Is he insane?
Lee Songha crumpled the business card and looked for a trash bin.
I exhaled the breath I had been holding and looked down at my champagne glass.
I really should have just poured it.
It would have been too much to handle, wouldnt it?
*
[6th Year Drought at Cannes Film Festival, City Jungle to Break it? Strong Contender for an Award!]
[City
Jungle Receives 7-Minute Standing Ovation at Cannes Film Festival Korean Cinema Receives Unprecedented Response]
[Lee Songha and Nam Joyoon, Praised for Their Exquisite Performance at Cannes, Garner Foreign Media Acclaim]
The team from 'City Jungle' was ecstatic, having engaged with media outlets from the U.S., France, Italy, and the Netherlands, among others.
Initially, the associates from 'City Jungle' were cautious about their chances, but following the press screening, internal optimism about winning an award had risen...
Who said that? Are they crazy? Were a strong contender now? Who said that?
Wasnt the standing ovation less than 7 minutes? I dont think it was that long.
While they fulfilled their schedule at Cannes, back home, every move of the 'City Jungle' team was being sensationalized.
The domestic cinema industry, desperate to save face or stir issues, pumped the news as if no movie had ever competed before.
The media hyped the atmosphere, and naturally, public opinion followed suit.
-City Jungle full standing ovation video
-Lee Songha, Nam Joyoon on the red carpet.jpg
-City Jungle foreign media reactions (beware of mistranslations)
-Seriously considering 'City Jungle' as a contender for an award
Its almost an Olympic-level topic now. If they return empty-handed, they might as well be accused of deceiving the nation. It seems they arent expecting to win here, though.
This feels like expecting a car going at 120 kilometers per hour to suddenly zoom up to 400. And it doesnt seem like it will stop anytime soon, not until it crashes into something.
Lee Kwanwoo sighed.
Is there really nothing else to talk about?
No, but this kind of baseless excitement needs to stop. Whos going to clean up this mess later? Will the journalists take responsibility if it turns into a joke?
Kim Hyunsup threw his phone in frustration.
Meanwhile, the real subjects of the conversation, Lee Songha and Nam Joyoon, sat crumpled in their party attire on a sofa, watching their manager and staff burst with frustration.
I stepped out to the balcony.
I tried to act nonchalant, but I felt somewhat uneasy. I took a deep breath of the night air. I rolled the lukewarm phone in my hand a few times before calling Mr. Park from the publicity team.
-Whats up? Arent you busy right now?
Hows the publicity team? Its chaos back in Korea.
-A bit too much, huh? But its good for publicity.
Isnt it about time to pour some cold water on this? If it doesnt pan out, the actors will end up being ridiculed.
-It happens every year.
Mr. Park replied nonchalantly.
Do you remember how the country was abuzz a couple of years back when Park Heeseung was up for Best Actor at the Berlin Film Festival? Even then, he came back empty-handed after all the noise had died down. This too shall pass and quiet down.
"Ah..."
Was it?
Everyone just gets swept up in the hype, how many really expect anything?
Team leader Park laughed.
"Just go and have fun without worrying too much."
After hanging up the phone, I leaned on the railing.
Lights of unknown desire or aspiration illuminated the night city.
It's a sight I see every day since I've been here. It's a sight that lifts the spirits every day.
Some days it seems close enough to grasp, other days it feels infinitely far. It seems I can't even touch the fragments of that light.
Today was the latter.
Suddenly, a sticky voice revived in my ear.
"Korean agent? Just cut them out."
"Do you have the power to do that?"
It was annoying earlier. Now, inexplicably, I find myself smiling.
Having worked day and night for the past few years, I thought I had climbed high, but looking up, the stairs still stretch dauntingly higha strangely thrilling realization.
I didnt realize how narrow my world was until it seemed to expand in an instant.
Such a dizzying euphoria.
A desire always coiled tight in my stomach suddenly swelled several times in size. My heart thumped wildly, and my mind was unusually clear. A richly intense vitality pounded through me, awakening every part of my body.
With tingling hands, I grasped the railing and looked down again.
Someday, this dazzling world will be within my grasp.
I took a deep breath and turned around. There, Lee Songha and Nam Joyoon stood like a pair of totem poles, staring at me through the balcony window.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
The two came out to the balcony without a word, their faces filled with unease.
"Don't feel pressured. Don't mind the journalists."
"I'm not."
"That's fine."
They responded simultaneously.
"Fine? You both look miserable."
"The miserable one is you."
Lee Songha retorted.
"Don't be too disappointed if you don't get the award."
"I'm not disappointed."
I never had much hope to begin with.
Realistically.
"Or feel crushed because the threshold of the world is too high..."
"I won't."
"A slump..."
"Stop."
I couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity. What kind of person do they see me as?
An incarnation of insatiable desire? A slave to ambition?
"Both of you might feel different, too. Even veteran actors get unsettled at international film festivals. They feel empty."
Back home, top-tier actors are unknowns here.
Some shrink back realizing they've been frogs in a well, while others are motivated to work even harder.
Which one are they?
"Do you feel any different?"
"Well, I'm still..."
Nam Joyoon tilted his head slightly.
"It still feels strange to be here. I've always watched this starry world on TV, thinking it wasn't my place."
He fiddled with his bow tie.
"And honestly, I'm at the peak of my life now, and it would be okay if it all ended tomorrow. As long as I can keep acting."
What to say.
Such an ashen person.
Having been through the rough tides at the bottom, having seen all manner of disgrace but unable to leave because of attachment, perhaps all that's left is a spark for acting.
"I'm not okay with that, if your goals are that modest."
At my words, Nam Joyoon smiled awkwardly.
Well, thats okay.
I might as well help him raise those goals.
Shake off the ashes, polish them up, and keep attending international film festivals, and soon he'll stop saying it doesn't seem like his place.
I patted Nam Joyoon on the back and turned to Lee Songha.
What about her?
I'm still confused about why she acts.
Is it because she loves acting? Because she wants to succeed?
Or because it's simply something she's good at?
She dug her own pit out of a sense of uselessness and started acting desperately to find her place, so I wonder if she still thinks that way.
If coming here could be a turning point for Lee Songha, that would be good...
"Brother, did you know?"
"What?"
"Megan Shaner went to an interview high on marijuana."
Out of the blue?
"A journalist I met at the reception said so. It would be a big deal in Korea, but here its nothing."
"What are you talking about?"
When you're too astounded, words tangle in your mouth.
Lee Songha leaned on the railing, her long hair disheveled by the wind.
"Just a thought. Issues that are difficult, serious, and troublesome for me seem like nothing to these people."
"That..."
"Brother."
Suddenly, a spark ignited in Lee Songhas eyes.
In them, a desire began to sprout.
"They all act like they are the protagonist."
She flared up as if she had never been lukewarm.
It's blinding.
"I want to live in that world."
Lee Songha turned to look at me.
"A world where you do what you want and have what you want."
As I looked into those entrancing eyes.
A sharp dizziness hit, and Lee Songha's face shattered before me.
Again, it was the future.
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